Sunday, July 24, 2005

Love Story

LOVE - The religion of Erich Segal's Oliver, the mush that M&Bs are made of, the poison that killed Juliet, the 'virtue' that drives Bollywood heroes, the antidote for all evil and... (what makes me give the larger half of the chocolate bar to my adorable li'l niece)

Such was the love that had sprung on the verdant campus of NITW; in the late August of 2002. The damp sidewalks and the puddles on the road to the Admin Block were just beginning to dry, and umbrellas were being put away until the next year. Tardy sloths of the second, third and final year were settling in with the quagmire of lab reports and class assignments; and wide-eyed, untouched first years were streaming into the hostels & learning to cringe when they met the peremptory glare of a second year or were beckoned by a nasty-looking final year.

In walked the HERO of our little story: Gah-wind, clad in pink leather, he was in what can be described to have attained the dizzying heights of haute couture in those happy times. Chewing a wad of gum (then advertised as Wriggly's Nick-o-teen), toting his luggage-bag (he was panting with the effort, but he bravely refused to betray any signs of cholestrol-induced weakness); our hero traipsed down the beaten road to the Hostel Office. Gah-wind whistled gay-ly and spat out the Nick-o-teen juice... then he went.. "Gah!!"

To give you a wind of the reason why Gah-wind went "Gah", we'll have to swerve our camera around, one hundred and eighty degrees, and train the lens on the sight that had struck Gah-wind. There!! What do we see? The very nimble Pretty-V!! The wind that had set the sails of our picaresque Gah-wind. Now, to the short-sighted, the nimbleness of our... uh-huh.. hmm... heroine may not be so evident. But, Gah-wind's heart had at that fateful moment started to beat only for Pretty-V, his throat was dry and there was the familiar feeling of weakness in the knees.. (the only OTHER time he had gone weak in the knees was when he'd seen Clark Gable in 'Gone with the Wind' turn on his heel at the Wilkes' and walk out of the library, leaving Scarlett mortified at the discovery of her little talk with Ashley).

However, unlike the subjects of most melodramatic love stories (including the one in which our hero's 'object of weakness', played Rhett Butler), we shall not let our hero's love remain unrequited. Unbeknownst to Gah-wind, Pretty-V too had, at that very fortuitous moment, fallen for our dauntless man. Years of chewing Nick-o-teen had given Gah-wind a jut-jaw and a rubbery tongue. He drawled for his vowels and drooled for his consonants, sputtered when in doubt and would now slur, when in love. This did not further his cause, for Pretty-V suffered from an acute case of aphasia and was congenitally dyslexic.

Despite the aforementioned impediments, Gah-wind and Pretty-V fought all odds and exemplified LOVE. Their tale is heart-rending. Even today, when I see Pretty-V nod despairingly when Gah-wind slurs and stutters agonisingly and hear Gah-wind go "Gah" at Pretty-V's inability to say "eeYyyess" to his plans; it warms the very cockles of my heart. Even the chill of winter winds and the heat of the Warangal sun won't serve to stultify the amazing power that binds these two. While they walk into the sun-set, holding each other's hands, Pretty-V pulls out a pack of Wriggly's from his pocket, Gah-wind giggles nervously as he fingers his Four-Square.

7 Patron Prattle:

At 7/26/2005 12:38 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

Thats a real wonderful story... I jus cant wait for the movie!!
Just a few additions though...

It was a real magical time for Gah-Wind and Pretty-V.

The world seemed just perfect for them... But wait! We almost forgot how vulnerable Gah-Wind is, because just when things were about to move to the next level, in walks the evil Cash_Tuba... She waltz's into the campus as if it were her own kindergarten playground and showers her magic on the poor unknowing, unsuspecting Gah-Wind. It wasn't too long when the all too familiar weak knees grabed hold of Gah-Wind. Innocent Pretty-V met Cash_Tuba and thought she was just being nice! Little did he know how deep the conspiracy reached... Days went by and all that Pretty-V could do was watch as his beloved Gah-Wind got sidetracked. He realised that it was just not meant to be... The evil Cash_Tuba had cast her spell on Gah-Wind and he is head over heels. It looks like nothing can undo the illfated curse...

What happens next?? Lets just wait for the movie...

PS: It is safe to say that Pretty-V, since then, has found greener pastures and has finally moved on...

 
At 7/26/2005 7:16 AM, Blogger Cos Θ said...

@Anonymous: Now that's just about how "Filmi" you could get. In REAL life, my dear sir/madam, "gay" love stories DO NOT have an evil temptress who steals away the hero... if there ever was such a thing as a 'temptor"... well... that would be IT!! Gah-wind, to my knowledge STILL can't stay away from Pretty-V, and I have supporting evidence... but never mind that.

About the movie, what do we call it? GONE WITH THE PRETTYv gahWIND?? Nice sequel that would be.. but Gah-Wind must be too weak in the knees by now.

 
At 7/29/2005 10:43 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

the 'evil temptress' was evil for one lovely for the other so it does make a classic!!!!......
we all r still watching on hw Cash - Tuba has cast her spell on Gah wind who currently is sufferring from acute aphasia!!!! nd as for Pretty V is concerned is rite nw on long vac to recuperate from the set back hes jus suffered....we r waiting to see hw he gets back with strategies to encounter the ongoing relationship between Cash-Tuba nd Gah Wind..he will defy make an attempt to fire out in all cylinders!!!....best of luck to best couple.... lets wait nd see if tis gets into a climax!!!!

 
At 7/30/2005 12:04 AM, Blogger L . Hyena, The said...

GAAAAAAAH...that is ONE lame-arse story...
why do i find myself pissed...you have done it, now prepare for WAR!!!

**blood curdling cry for revenge**

L. Hyena
In Vijaya's ofice

PS: But having said that...it was uhm...well written...yer not bland and un-imaginative after all...GACK

 
At 7/31/2005 3:34 AM, Blogger Cos Θ said...

@Anonymous: Atleast half of the world (which constitutes my audience) knows who "anonymous" is, so it's time you come out of 'hiding'. :P
As for you getting out on 'all fours' and baring your fangs, you might do all you please; cuz it's a lonely place out there in the Colosseum. Just you and Gah-wind. :D
May the best couple prosper! (Do I see a communion between Pretty-V and Gah-wind?)

 
At 7/31/2005 3:52 AM, Blogger Cos Θ said...

@LH: Didja say WAR? Am a veteran, dear boy!! And revenge is a sweet thing, but I don't have a sweet tooth. I have the poisoned end of my dagger to prick you with, though.. ROTFL!!
And.. ahem.. GV's office, eh? Farewell party??

PS: My humility forbids me to accept credit for the 'imagination' that your love story affords us.

 
At 8/02/2005 3:56 AM, Anonymous Anonymous said...

oh k the scond anonymous is nt hu u think it is!!!..nyways still awaiting his arrival!!!!!

 

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